Friday, February 17, 2012

a different kind of difficult

all the jobs i've had, i could do them because there was a light at the end of the tunnel- money, respect, experienced gained and so on. i would push through a long day because i knew my mummy would have dinner ready for me, or my room would still be there, my sanctuary from the storm. i also had the freedom of quitting at a whim.

the position of ender's mama is one of extraordinary endurance and work ethic. i am terribly weak in both. and if you look at motherhood as a job, and you can, and i will for today, it is the hardest work i've ever had to face day in and day out. Inmature leslie would be asking around for a new position already or deciding to go back to school on her parent's dime, ha! Its true. Yet, for the first time in my life I am doing a job and still reaping bountiful rewards by putting another person before me. Imagine that! 24/7 folks. the life i live is supernatural now. it was before, it could have been, but God used ender to have me see beyond the material.

this is ender's world view

he owns it

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