Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Cora's Nook

I can be a little illogical when it comes to "things i have to do before the impending arrival of baby"  For instance, make puffy, floral clouds.  These cumulus (latin for heap!) clouds were like weights on my shoulders until I stitched the last thread and they floated off my to do list and up above cora's nook.  I am ridiculous! 
Well, speaking of To Do Lists, I have Cora written down for February 1st and it would be exhilarating to cross her off on said date.  I'm half kidding myself. 
I have been having contractions since last night.  They are mild.  (Mild in comparison to the storm on the horizon, that is.)  And I'm nervous, but just so happy that I am experiencing them.  I didn't experience any labor pains with ender, not even those false braxton hicks.  He was more like a spirit child ho humming around in my uterus, pretending not to be human.  Cora, however, is  reading her textbooks and playing by the rules.  Thats my girl!  It gives me hope that I will not have another C-section.  

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

I thought this was an original look from him.  But the more I think about it, the more I realize he is most likely mirroring the look I am giving him.  "Are you crazy?"  is often the question my expression asks him.  He is sweet then he is mouth watering, eye tearing sour the next second.  Ok, but really he is sweet and cordial for the most part.  Let me just tell myself he is transitioning mentally, emotionally and physically into the next stage of humanhood. 
Age: 27 months
Phrases: "How bout you do it!" "ehhh, let me try" "Absolutely NOT!" (you stole that one from me) "I love you" "mama, where mama go?" or "mama, where did (so and so) go?"
This is a mere smidgen of what you tend to say.  You enunciate clearly and I can talk to you about almost anything in your bright, small world. 
I walked into your room this morning.  You were standing up talking and look away from the door.
I said, "good morning ender" you jumped a mile high, looked at me as though I were a ghost, screamed a scream I never heard before then began to cry.  That broke my heart!  I am so so sorry.  I'm sorry for laughing too.

Sunday, January 27, 2013

Nana's Garden- Nana's iphone

Ender is beginning to initiate photo shoots.  He sits still long enough for a steady snap, then he zips it  to the camera to get a load of the cute guy in the picture.  
Here Ender sits next to his cousins "Colt & Isla".  Mama has many creatures and magical children hiding in her garden.  And so did her mama, Bobbye Jean.  Bobbye Jean who used to live in a yellow house.  I would go there in the summers and talk secretively with all of the enchanted stone statues.  
I intend to create my own haven for my family.  All magical critters welcome!

Thursday, January 24, 2013

Losing Sight on the Wild Blue Yonder

  Often, I have thought about wearing a golden calf around my neck.  As a reminder that I make myself and other people in the internet realm an idol. There are so many photographs, reality tv shows, facebook pages, blogs that showcase us.  We have become the gilded cow.  And by "we", i would be safer in speaking for myself and saying "me!".  Staying at home with ender i use the internet to be my eyes and ears.  But I'm gathering assumed versions of people and using their so called lives to plumb line mine.  Then there is a storm in my mind and heart to make my life just as reflectively beautiful as the ones I think I see.  I begin to feel somehow less because I am not known by the masses.  I am not artistically inclined to frame the details of my silly crafts, meals, or travels.  The majority of my days are spent grocery shopping, doing laundry, house cleaning, getting ender dressed, going to the park.  Yes, mundane things.  But , I've lost the vision God gave me: that is, to see people, zander and ender in particular, for the eternal beings they are.  Their hearts are a wilderness filled with intrigue, passion, and adventure. That goes for Jesus but forever fold.    Hm, maybe just wearing a small Sinai mountain pendent would be more aesthetic than a fat ol cow.   
AND.....Zander has cataracts.  Um.  I'm working on empathizing with him.  It sounds bad, it is bad, but my defense mechanism when hardships come my way is to ignore it and maybe it will go away :)  Oh those beautiful blues eyes of his.  Such a simple shade, but immeasurable
in their meaning.
and here are these baby blues.  golly, he was 14 months here?  he stayed so still for photographs.  I need to work harder on getting up close with him again.  hopefully he will be spared the old man disease zander has acquired.  but if he is a smidgen like his daddy, he will be able to turn his troubles to triumphs.  bless 'em both.

Sunday, January 20, 2013

Black Rose

Another fauna friend for our house.

I have yet to understand why I am so enchanted by purple plants, (some so deep they stain black or chocolate), but I am.  As a kid, purple was one of my least favorite colors.  Yet, by the time I heard my wedding bells ring, I was in love with "eggplant".  And on our honeymoon, zander & i hiked  Bright Angel Trail in the great Grand Canyon where a plateau of purple prickly pear first peaked my interest.  Those are my most recent memories of my attraction.  Somewhere along my life someone or someplant must have secretly charmed me...
The only photo that is mine is dead center :)  The others I randomly chose off google images without citing the source.  Ah well, how much harm can a  little naughty blog hiding in a teeny tiny corner of the internet universe cause?
1. Wandering Jew
2. Cordyline Red Star
3. purple potato plant vine
4. prickly pear
5. Purple Shamrock
6. Coleus-dark chocolate
7.  Dracula Raven
8. Black Star Calle Lily
9.Black Magic Elephant Ears

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

nap nix

a rare moment of a napping ender foot.

For the past two months, Ender has been finicky about his siestas.  How does anyone not want to sleep?!  I'm almost addicted to it, well, its certainly an idol of mine.  Whenever this kid changes his habits I go through a panic phase.  Especially with Cora full steam ahead, I need ender to acquiesce to our afternoon naps.  He will stay in his bed and chat, sing, count, bounce, but the walls are tense with his energy.  The hushness that fall over a house when a babe is fast asleep is some of the most glorious music of heaven. 
I'm sure Google is annoyed with the majority of my searches investigating the "problems" of my toddler.  But, I just have to know exactly why he is pooping two-three times through out his allotted napping time and not falling asleep!
 I would ask him after a while, "Aren't you tired?!" 
"No, I'm happy!"
Oh brother, well I'm not.  Go to sleep!  :) 
Nothing more, but a toast to flexibility, change, and adventure! 

Monday, January 14, 2013

Donkey Tail - a succulent

Before my mom had to go back to work we took an afternoon to do one of our favorite things together.  Visit the garden shops & nurseries.  I hardly ever tell myself "no" when I see a plant or a pot for sale.  Mama bought me this houseplant, Donkey Tail, at Home Depot.  It would have been nice to support our local nursery, but we just couldn't find anything that spoke to us that day.  Our old neighbor at the bungalow had a copious amount of cacti and succulents decorating her windows and floor and walls and shelves and toilet seat, basically every nook and cranny. 
My dream would be to knock out as many dark holes in our house as possible, think Atrium!  And then never stop welcoming plants into our home.  I want people to bless me "The crazy plant Lady"
Funny thing is, my houseplant thumb is black.  I'm going to try and keep a record of my pets on my blog for a quick reference of care and maintenance.  Perhaps that will help. 

Tuesday, January 08, 2013

Lists & Listnesses

From the time of Cora's conception we decided to compartmentalize her to the last home stretch of her 9 month journey in the womb.   We had to buy a house, celebrate Ender's birthday party, attend more parties, build a block wall, celebrate Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years....  Well, her last month came at the stroke of midnight January 1st.  I furiously wrote a to do list and have been sluggishly going through it. 

We finally got a washing machine.  Does anyone believe me that I've been doing laundry at my parent's house for the last 7 years?  Do I sound pathetic or totally committed to rolling with the financial punches ?  :)

I have failed miserably in my pursuit to prepare, though.  My relationship with Jesus waned, with Zander it strained and I have been unnecessarily impatient and fed up with Ender.  Bless him.  Its been that bad.

But today!  Today I resolutely ask Jesus for help and to change me.  I'd much rather get back to being madly in love with Jesus, Zander and  Ender than listlessly pondering my life & concerning myself with action items.  I throw my chaff in the wind!

Here is Ender gleefully swinging in Nana's and Papa's hammock.  He loves for me to wind him up and spin him out.  He does this odd inhaling laugh when he is supremely  pleased with something.  Spinning is one of them. 

I love you little guy.  I'm sorry I put cleaning my breast pump, organizing cora's clothes, & hemming curtains (among other things) before you :)