Tuesday, December 28, 2010


ender misses katie too

Saturday, December 18, 2010

in the winter garden.

swiss chard. great for salads.

snap pea curl.
peppermint.
spanish lavender.
carrots with a bougain villa spread.
bok choy. prepare it like a cabbage stew. oh and ender.

Friday, December 10, 2010

8 1/2 weeks on this planet. assimilating quite well. still speaking his alien tongue
currently, the team is working on a commumicatio system; referencing classics like Independence Day.

Tuesday, December 07, 2010

Zander, as of late, has expressed the disillusionment, the lack luster, the gap between the boy and his young father. It must be difficult to connect with a human so tiny and mainly in need of milk. Zander also works outside the home, furthering his feelings of disconnection.

A light bulb blinked on in my head, "Aha!" thought I, "I will find him articles in our baby book that will address this very issue and he will grow in knowledge and encouragement." Then my light bulb fizzed out for I then thought, "Who am I kidding! Zander does not get encouragement for the heart from scholarly research. He will probably have already figured his dilemma out his own way- with God."

That is so frustrating to me! It is much easier for me to Google what the world has to say and report the 'facts' and call it day. It is much harder for me to ask God, hear His answer and confidently tell Zander. Well, I ended up marking the page in our book.

Lo and behold, he came home that day on a surge wave of enlightenment from God he received while listening to a Keith Green song. (that Isaac kept playing on repeat just so he could hear Zander sing this one part off key) And that one part off key, was just spark of realization Zander needed about our baby human.

they will make it just fine.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

ender visited oak creek. breathing the air in this canyon is like taking a good draught of Ent water. he is unaware, but he grew 1 inch that weekend.


noah holding ender on his lap. M.I.A: jack, their more experienced and mature cousin living just one hour-ish shy.


happy noah & erin

zander expressing his maternal side.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Weezer - I'm Your Daddy

a excerpt for ender

the bridged version. believe it or not.


there once was a baby (that would be you little one) growing inside a euphoric young woman(and that would be me). this child had an astonishing effect over her mind. the world was filtered through the life inside of her. he bathed her brain with an elixir of peace.


one night, the young man she was married to (your daddy, of course), received two tickets to Weezer for his birthday from his cousins. (those cousins will remain cool).


the ecstatic couple began planning their night. they would sit high upon the hill away from the loud speakers and sweaty fans and enjoy their childhood band like retired people. the elixir of peace made it ok not to be a screaming teenager. there is a season.

the music of weezer connected these two from the start. you could read more about it (the unabridged version) in your travel book, where the story gushes more about true love, epic battles, and redemption: all common themes in a 15 year old's life, right?


anyway....

the night of the show you could see them parking far far way to get free parking.( you have cheap parents kid) 8 1/2 months of belly waddled briskly toward the show. after a mile of walking in a panic, thinking they would miss the opening song, they finally made it to the ticket booth only to have their wonderful SLR man- handled. After bickering with a very butch woman, they agreed to disassemble the camera and promise not to take photos (they meant it ). Therefore no photos of this night were taken; we will roll oldschool and pass down stories via word. word.


After kicking away empty beer cups, cigarette butts, and other human trash, they cleared for themselves a nice little nit ch to sit on the trampled grass. They were both anxious to be in a crowd like that, insecure, out of place. But then, oh but then! Childhood came strolling out on stage to an 'Epic beginning' and manifested itself in a middle aged rock nerd. the boy held the girl all show. now typically, a public display of affection like this would cramp her style. yet again, the elixir of peace cured any of her hang ups.

As she danced and sang and looked up at the band wide eyed, she thought "those guys think they are so cool, ha! they're old! i'm the one hanging out with a guy way more talented, funny, hip, smart and cool. You all suck compared to him." She thought that toward her favorite band! My my my. You see, boy, that is what love does to you, so please wait a while.

the night carried and on and soon 'My Name is Jonas' sprung from the set. By that time the couple found themselves against the railing, stage right. Surprisingly, the crowd parted along with their cigarette smoke and allowed for the girl to rest her tired body on the barricade. Well, along comes Rivers Cuomo, running down the line of stretched out hands groping the air in hopes of receiving a high five. "Aha!" thought, the girl, "This is my chance to impress the boy! This is the moment God set aside." She held out her hand and when the lead singer clapped her palm, she closed her hand on his and pulled him up on the railing. There he continued to sing and entertain. (What a great vantage point)! She wasn't finished yet. Thankfully, she wore shorts under her dress. For up flung the hem of her dress revealing her swollen, pale belly. She grabbed his hand and placed it square on her stomach. Mr. Rivers pulled back shocked, bug eyed, and then, replaced his hand on the crazy fan's belly and continued singing. Commence a good belly rubbing to a classic song.

The girl was beaming with pride! The boy was gawking in disbelief; not sure whether to be offended or mad with glee. But in that moment the two of them fell into a time warp. they were drowning in nostalgia. they fell in love all over again and ten fold. their son was blessed by river's cuomo, fully rock god, fully nerd: a miracle. (no blasphemy intended here, truly) there childhood love unexpectantly swung full circle before the birth of the first son. it couldn't have been more fitting.



*your late uncle william, while incubating in Nana, attended a Willy Nelson concert. Your grandpa got in a brawl over a willy T that was thrown out into the crowd. No shirt, but a pretty shiner. In utero rock concerts run in the family.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Friday, November 05, 2010





A week after giving birth or really being sliced open in a kind of sci fi way (c-section)... zander obliged me for a walk down his parent's street. There and back again, he urged me to venture a little further. We rounded the corner on Lafayette and strolled along the mini canal. He began to reminisce about catching crawdads this time of year with his friends. The air, the light, the sounds, in unison called him back to his childhood.

His eyes suddenly getting big he asked, "would you want to fish for crawdads?!"
Wearily, I replied, "right now?! but what about the baby? he needs to eat soon."
"Nah, he's fine, lets do this!"

Well, if he was going to play that card, I haughtily replied, that as a little girl I didn't use a line and hot dog (as z suggested) but my BARE HANDS! Gasp! Yes, i was a tom boy.

Zander was too excited to bother with my curt response as we decidedly walked back to pillage his parent's place for a hot dog and fishing line.

It was the perfect evening. Ender, our beloved, was napping with grandma, and we escaped.
Barely containing himself, he ordered me to pinch a piece of dog off and he tied it to the line. Seeing that he was taking his craft very seriously left me no room to laugh at him. I found myself getting caught up in his happiness and I listened to the master fisherman. He casted the line in at a shadowy, squirmy figure lurking just below the surface of the silt. The hot dog scared the critter away. He re casted. Then from down stream, an army of crawdads appeared (picture Pirates of the Caribbean when the skeletal pirates are marching under the ocean and the moon light spills onto their decrepit bodies. Imagine, the heart thumping music as they advance with evil stealth toward their fleshy prey). Yes, I tell you the truth, crawdads are just like that!

Zander and I squealed with delight and a little bit of the creeps. The hoard was soon upon the hot dog. Their bodies roiled and fought each other. With a few tries, zander coached me in the art of yanking one up on land. The fishy glutton still ate ferociously as it spun on the line in mid air. Disgusting! I found myself, giggling. Yes, giggling, giggling like a very non tom boy.
That evening i was huckelberry's little girl friend. And I didn't mind.

Besides, if I'm honest with myself. I only pretended to catch crawdads with my bare hands to impress my ultra tomboy best friend, danielle. I actually, just splashed the water really hard as my fingers went for them, hoping that they would be scared off before I was forced to pinch the back of their necks.

Its a very delicate illusion being a tom boy.

Wednesday, November 03, 2010

oh halloween


my two best friends. as a pilot, its good to have the force of mother nature and the cunning of zorro as your wingmen.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

its a very small world


in his world today, his umbilical cord fell off! now he can enjoy baths and showers, though grandma's spas are unbeatable! the kid melts in her lathery palms, ha! its true.
we have matching bags under our eyes. huh.

to make my heart beat a little faster...thanks for the e-mail mom.












Friday, October 22, 2010


Finding myself soaring between Heaven and limbo. i'm quite pleased that Jesus stays awake with me late at night comforting me. " in the multitude of my anxieties within me, Your comfort delights my soul" psalm 94:19.
These days clinging to Jesus in a new and desperate way.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

tree company

a boy and a girl living as wild people in a tree fort in an abode that is drafty, creaky, old and any wind rattles the frail, leafy windows.

one day, they wake up to an unusual sound. Looking down to see the most strange and beautiful creature cradled in the knarly roots of the tree, the man boy quickly scrambles down to load this alluring oddity in their basket and hoist him up to take a closer look.


it looks like them, but smells a lot sweeter. not sure why they are falling deeply in love, they take the cub and tuck him in a little corner and decide to keep it.


they call him ender.

that night the woodland fairies enter in through their window and tell them secrets about ender. most perplexing of all...these magical beings resemble their own dear mothers.

Sunday, October 03, 2010

climb on




ender and i lounged on the crash pad while these nerds scrambled up a beautiful rock face. it is the last hike we will have done before he gets evicted from his kangaroo pouch.
one more week!


Tuesday, September 28, 2010

on the plot for fall




last season's lessons:
1) know what "grubs" you are disposing of, eh'hem zander! lady bug babies are great!
2) water slow and deep
3) heat wave tomatoes are true to their name.
4) corn is a waste of our humble plot's time. it attracted gluttonous green caterpillars.
5) don't be afraid to start a compost pile, they actually work!
6) give most away! especially to moms who know how to thoroughly use the potential of a home grown good.

A quote for our zander: "Unemployment is capitalism's way of getting you to plant a garden" -orson scott card.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

~isla victoria's~ birthdays

1st day with nana. pool party.
aunt leslie's homemade isla bean bags.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

an aunt extraordinaire




















































aunt kim, bless her, is endeavoring to make little alexander v a quilt! i sent her a splash of ideas that hopefully she can make sense of. i'm too all over the place when it comes to colors and themes. i can't wait to see the magic she weaves. i'm on sewing pins and needles! ha!

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

a rich man's song

people smile and tell me i'm the lucky one
and we've just begun, i think i'm gonna have a son
he will be like you and me, free as a dove
conceived in love, the sun is gonna shine above

even though we ain't got money
i'm so in love with ya honey
everything will bring a chain of love
in the mornin when i rise
you bring a tear of joy to my eyes
and tell me everythings gonna be all right

seems as though a month ago, i was beta chi
never got high
oh i was a sorry guy
and now i smile and face the girl who shares my name
now i'm through with the game
this boy will never be the same

pices, virgo rising is a very good sign
strong and kind
and the little boy is mine
now i see a family where there once was none
now we've just begun
yeah, we're gonna fly to the sun

love the girl who holds the world in a paper cup
drink it up, love her and she'll bring you luck
if ya find she helps your mind, better take her home
oh dontcha live alone, try to earn what lovers own

even though we ain't got money
i'm so in love with ya honey
everything will bring a chain of love
in the mornin when i rise
you bring a tear of joy to my eyes
and tell me everything is gonna be all right

Sunday, August 22, 2010

ender's dreams


these winged beauties will hover in front of an old map of arizona. so while he is getting his pants changed, he can dream and scheme his desert escapades.

Thursday, August 05, 2010