i have come upon a piece of knowledge that is a large, gilded key to this boy's treasure trove of a mind. After talking it over with his grandma, listening to a cd, reading a book, and filling out a survey, I found the key hidden in the letters that form the term "Strong Will". And now a map to his mind unfurls before me and I can navigate this kid so much better than before.
I once thought that a strong willed person was aggressive and athletic, which neither describe ender. I am such a caveman. But a strong will can be found in the most gentlest of creatures. Not saying ender is the most tender, but he certainly is affectionate, intelligent, funny, nice, willing to share and a sociable little guy. I was searching for help under all the wrong key words "three year old screams and hits" "three year old spits" "three year old doesn't like positive attention when hurt".
Helpful links, but the heart of the matter is this strong personality disorder of his. Well, okay its not a disorder, its a trait. But some days I'm this close to admitting him into the psych ward.
Our whippersnapper is tenacious, a problem solver, doesn't take NO for an answer, and wants to do it ALL by himself.
Its not about giving him free reign, but about me being a better captain so Ender can charter this terrestrial ball with more confidence and ease.
"Don't forget your Christmas bonus is coming up too Mrs. Toth. Because we all haven't forgotten the night shifts you worked."
I'd walk away knowing that the bonus was going to be a doozy. I got the short end of the stick and had to sleep train a strong willed, three year old boy with a scream that cuts straight through bone and marrow and pierces your very soul.
Of course I won't leave my secretary without anything. Zander's support (with or without his ear protection (but mainly with) was crucial. Coming soon to his desk, "Worlds Best Secretary" coffee mug. I know how its done.